If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Randomize
