His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
