Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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