party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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