:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
