too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Randomize
