i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
