At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
