I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
