I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize