Do vagina's smell?
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
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