mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
