Texts From Last Night

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  (517): View more from Michigan

  6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.

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  (517) 6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning. http://tfl.nu/t7a0
  Replies (2) Good night (1295) Bad night (537)
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  (510): View more from California

  I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...

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  (510): I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring... http://tfl.nu/set0
  Replies (80) Good night (2971) Bad night (8396)
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  (951): View more from California

  now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.

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  (951): now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria. http://tfl.nu/9jm0
  Replies (29) Good night (771) Bad night (6477)
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  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high

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  (321): my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high http://tfl.nu/1lyw
  Replies (24) Good night (4985) Bad night (984)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?

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  (519): i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends? http://tfl.nu/08w4
  Replies (101) Good night (34863) Bad night (4119)
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!

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  (802): just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke! http://tfl.nu/q0f1
  Replies (39) Good night (7160) Bad night (2109)
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  (585): View more from New York

  Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there

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  (585): Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there http://tfl.nu/9lof
  Replies (12) Good night (5308) Bad night (1293)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.

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  (850): She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed. http://tfl.nu/7kwk
  Replies (10) Good night (3263) Bad night (910)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?

  (303): View more from Colorado

  He told her it was international road head day.

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  (720): Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min? (303): He told her it was international road head day. http://tfl.nu/xtw8
  Replies (11) Good night (5429) Bad night (1267)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective

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  (630): He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective http://tfl.nu/wbyh
  Replies (2) Good night (1469) Bad night (819)
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL

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  (217): Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL http://tfl.nu/5sam
  Replies (7) Good night (1538) Bad night (598)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.

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  (609): I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved. http://tfl.nu/m2zi
  Replies (5) Good night (795) Bad night (1534)
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?

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  (701): Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub? http://tfl.nu/kxla
  Replies (6) Good night (1013) Bad night (671)
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  (931): View more from Tennessee

  Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.

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  (931): Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close. http://tfl.nu/0xt0
  Replies (3) Good night (987) Bad night (764)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is

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  (704): I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is http://tfl.nu/xljt
  Replies (9) Good night (588) Bad night (297)

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