If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
25 Porn Addicts Admit Their Biggest Pet Peeves
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that