I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize