porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
You took a bar mat shot.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
