Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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