Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Maybe he injected his testicle?
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Your shirt... Was in my pants
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Randomize
