You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
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