he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
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