Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
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