he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
