bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
