remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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