return my video game
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
