Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
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