I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
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I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
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Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
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