my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Randomize