dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
do nipples grow back?
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