Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
i came on her dog
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
