whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
