Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
