I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
