Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Randomize
