Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
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