Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
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