They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
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