I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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