Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
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