She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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