i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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