i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize