I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
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