We're like a lot better than the average bears
my mouth tastes like poor choices
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
