WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
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