so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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