On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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