What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Randomize
