Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
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