(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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