And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Randomize
